At some points in life, religion seems pretty irrelevant. Some accuse people of using religion to commit the most devastating atrocities and yet we forget that most values have been forsaken when these cruel deeds are done. Then again, atheist have also engage in cruel actions also but with the reasoning of something that they believe in or a certain principle. Not all people should be judge first-hand by their faith or lack of faith.
Yet I still believe. A few days ago I wrote on my wall, “To feed my mind, give me logic. To feed my soul, give me faith.” Indeed for me seems to represent my faith right now. My brain my sometimes question the belief and yet my heart clings on to the vestiges of faith left. My heart would definitely bend in and break into a million pieces and my soul will turn into an empty vessel if I forsake my belief. So I believe because I want to. Because I choose to.
These few days of uncertainty would be extremely challenging as I would need to conceal and push away my own ambitions and dreams to allow His will to be done. It is so difficult to just think about the amount of commitment and struggle that I have gone through only to leave it to the unknown. Yet isn’t this unknown according to my faith, God?
I feel a bit like Peter now. In a boat rocking in a raging sea, stuck in a storm. The screaming wind calling me to take the leap. To let go.
To let His will be done.
Let Your will be done.
Posted on January 7, 2012
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